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You Are The Welcome-est Person Ever

“Thank You”s feed the world.

Being appreciated infuses joy into our body, boosts our spirits, and makes us willing and energized to do more and be more. Appreciation is the food of the soul. 

You can call it many different names; acknowledgment, validation, appreciation, worthiness, love, kindness…But they all are the same. Giving and receiving these is how we heal.  It sustains all our efforts. It is a reflection of love and helps us love ourself.

 

Thankful People Are Happy

Appreciated people are happy, too.

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You Are Not Alone

People are in such pain. And they feel so alone in it.

I know they are not alone. I’ll prove it. I am sure some of you can relate to some of these feelings. You. You are not alone!

Did you ever feel…

…like not answering the question “how are you?” since you can’t put the feelings to words, or you don’t think anyone would understand, or it is not worth their time?

…that it  would be worse if you shared, because if no one understood, it would feel even lonelier?

…that someone was walking all over you and if you spoke up you’d come across as overreacting? Since this was not their “intention”, they feel like they did nothing wrong. So you hold the scream in. Continue Reading →

Being Yourself, Being Your Self

Did you ever say, “I don’t even know who I am”?

What does this mean when we say this?  Do we only have one identity? And our life goal is to find it? As if when we feel this way, whichever way we thought before we must have been wrong about.

I don’t think so.

Don't Know Who You are? Become a possibilitarian Continue Reading →

Defending Anger, Angrily: “I Am Not Angry!”

Today I am pleased to have a guest post by Galen Pearl of 10 Steps to FInding Your Happy Place and Staying There. I have been reading her blog for close to a year and have appreciated her honesty and compassion for herself and others. Her pearls of wisdom are never short of luster. Today she is talking about feelings…

“Feelings, whoa whoa whoa, feelings….” 

Feelings, Roger Whittaker

I Am Not Angry!

Galen Pearl 10 Steps to finding your happy place and staying thereYears ago, I was a very uptight person. I didn’t see myself that way. I saw myself as being in control, of myself and of, well, everything else. I never got upset, never cried, never asked for help or let anyone see if I was struggling. Of course, I never struggled. Thinking back, I never really laughed, either, not a deep belly laugh.

I had a friend who was short on tact, but always told the truth as she saw it. She observed that I was an angry person, very angry. “Seething with rage” is how she described it, along with “barely contained,” and “always on the brink of exploding.”

How did I respond to her assessment? “I am not angry!” Continue Reading →

Neediness Anxiety

A few more thoughts on “Need”… (See Thursdays post A Question of Need)

Need Worries

Many people have neediness anxiety: AKA “worry about being too needy.” Being “too needy” is generally frowned upon in our individualistic culture. And when we (like appropriate, regular human beings) desire some help or company, we mistakenly think something is way wrong with us.

This is ridiculous!

Are you too needy? Do you have neediness anxiety?

I think the last line could be “Love someone.”

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A Question of Need

Need. People throw around this word all the time.

I need… You need to… I may need…. Do you think I need….?


A Question of Need is a Question Indeed

Sometimes it is innocuous enough–when we don’t mean it literally and the person we are talking to knows this–but other times it means a great deal. This, I think, is where it can be dangerous. So I have tried consciously to remove it from my vocabulary. Continue Reading →

When You Feel Like You are Going Backwards Remember: There is Only One Direction

thee is only one direction

http://abundantsoul.com

Ever feel like you are going backwards?

Someone wrote this on my Facebook page:

After two good days I can’t stop crying today. It feels like I’m back to how I was feeling before. Those two days were brilliant. Today I feel scared it won’t come back! What do I do for myself? 

I replied:

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Universal Oneness- Know Your Connection!

This is the 9th in 10 Things to do in 2012.

Universal oneness know your connection to the worldThe concept of universal oneness is sometimes hard to wrap your brain around.  We grew up with us/them, win/lose mentality.  This is called dual thinking and it is the cause of so many of our problems. We feel separate from other people and this has us up to all sorts of antics: getting angry, feeling hurt, seeing injustice, not belonging, hating, fearing, acting mean, but most of all, has us feeling desperately, completely, utterly alone in the world.  Even in a crowded room. Continue Reading →

MLK: Addressing Your Anger

Martin Luther King Jr. Addressing angerAddressing Anger is the 5th on the list of 10 things to do in 2012. (I skipped “4. Understanding Impermanence” but I’ll get to it soon.)

A teacher was telling me the story of her student who, when learning about Martin Luther King Jr., asked her, “Even after all of the things that happened to him, why is he always smiling?” Continue Reading →

You Are Allowed To Feel!

This is the third of 10 Things to Do in 2012!

“You are allowed to feel! You are allowed!”

I was “giving permission” to a client who was attempting to allow herself to be angry for the first time.  She closed her eyes tight, tried to breath, and stay with me.  But panic arose.

“What might happen?  This feels horrible!” Continue Reading →

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