Did you ever say, “I don’t even know who I am”?
What does this mean when we say this? Do we only have one identity? And our life goal is to find it? As if when we feel this way, whichever way we thought before we must have been wrong about.
I don’t think so.
I think we have many identities, there are many us’s. But when something happens that challenges even one of them, we feel discombobulated. (I used “discombobulated” in my Anxiety Schmanxiety post yesterday.) And so often it feels like that one “me” is all we were, and as if we are nothing without it.
And that belief captures so much of our attention, it becomes hard to pull our eyes away.
As a helper, I deal with atrocities on a daily basis. I hear about hard things that people go through. I feel the traumas in my bones as I listen. Despite the stories of suffering, which I acknowledge and hold in my heart. I see them, the beauty in them.
But it is hard for them to see.
“I don’t even know who I am.” People tell me. As if they’ve been misplaced.
I know, I think. You have been showing me this whole time.
You can do things, you have learned skills. Skills in managing hard people. Skills in protecting yourself. Skills in giving of yourself. Skills in negotiating. Skills in standing up. Skills in giving in. Skills in generosity. Skills in loving, showing compassion, sharing. Skills in picking yourself up. Skills in just being you.
How did you learn these? Who was with you as you learned them? What do you think about them? How have they served you?
Who do these skills say that you are?????
You are giving, forgiving.
You are kind, able, secure.
You are patient, knowledgeable, strong, loving, connecting.
You are powerful, generous, smart, good.
You are beautiful.
You are everything.
This, you can not misplace.
I am a mother, earth server, driver, worker, listener, homeowner, blogger, peacemaker, student, teacher, lover, gardener, singer, cook, cuddlier, laugher, dreamer….I am a possibilitarian.
What are you???
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